February 19, 2012

[home, sin, and everything in between]

I got back today from a lovely trip to Fort Worth/Dallas. I got to see Ben Rector for the second time in the last 2 months (he gets cuter every time) and Needtobreathe for the first time ever at House of Blues on Thursday night.. yay for skipping my Friday class. Even though I was gone from Norman for 3 whole days, it felt like a real short weekend unfortunately. Oh well. ALSO, on an unrelated note (I'm not really good at the whole tying things in if you've noticed) I realized that Norman is my home now, meaning it was good to go back to Fort Worth, but I missed Norman quite a bit. Finally, after 3 and a half years of going to school in Oklahoma, I finally feel like I live here. And the best part - this is my last semester here.. that was sarcasm if you couldn't tell. I really like Norman.

And moving on . . .

This morning I went to a different church than I usually go to when I'm home. I'd been wanting to try it out for a while now, so I finally did today. This morning the preacher quoted Simone Weil (some philosopher dude):

"Every sin is an attempt to fly from emptiness."

Spot on.

So sin means to miss the mark right? An offense against moral law.. an immoral act. Take your pick.

So I started thinking about it.. SO true. I never thought about sin that way. I thought about sin as rebellion. I thought about it as a trait of the imperfect.

but never did I ever think about it this way.

So, let's do a little experiment. I'm going to pick a few sins that I constantly engage in:

1. Gluttony
2. Gossip
3. Worry


1. gluttony: when I overeat (specifically chocolate covered raisins and/or Dove dark chocolate after a long week), I am legitimately hoping the freaking candy will soothe me. I overeat chocolate.. because I feel empty. Not my stomach - myself in general.

2. gossip: when I gossip, I am intentionally putting someone else down in order to make myself feel better.. because I feel empty.

3. worry: when I worry, I am not believing that my God is strong enough to lead me through my circumstances. If I were satisfied, I wouldn't worry. But I worry.. because I feel empty.

Funny how that works out. Mr. Weil, you seem like a very wise man.

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