March 4, 2012

[freshman in life]

2 official months until this girl graduates.

This past week I had to apply to graduate.. sounds pretty intense; however, I can assure you it's not. I basically filled out two forms indicating my major, degree, current address, birthdate, and other minor details. WOO. But I will tell you that just the idea of the whole "applying to graduate" thing is a little on the creepy side. I know, I know.. I've been in college for the full four years (no victory lap, unfortunately) so clearly, my time has come. It's just a little weird actually thinking about the reality of it. Starting from when I was in kindergarten up until this year, I have constantly been asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Turns out apparantly I'm going to magically be "grown up" come this May. Don't worry, I'll be sure to tell you on May 12, 2012 what it feels like to be a "grown up" if you ask.

I've come to a few realizations as I come to this point in life.. I'm deep - get over it. Also, I've come to the realization that I like lists, but that's another subject.

a.  I'm pretty sure I'm not going to become a new person come May 12. It's going to be the same me with a degree that I could potentially frame.. and in all reality, I'm not quite sure that I would frame that bad boy.

b.  Going along with becoming a new person, I'm not going to magically be completely fulfilled in life. It's not like, "Oh sweet! Now that I have finally reached my dreams of obtaining a degree after 16 long freaking years of attending school, I'm legitimately content." There are more things in life; there are more goals to reach; there are more people to meet and places to go.

c.  Great things are about to happen. "There are far, far better things to come than any we have left behind." Thank you C.S. Lewis.

Graduation can be a scary time. Most likely you're moving away from friends and the college town you have spent the last four years in. You're getting out of your comfort zone. The world has told me that I'm supposed to be a grown up in the real world dependent upon myself. I have to wear business suits to work everyday. No one jokes around and acts like a kid. (Those last few are lies, by the way). No matter what you're told, the concept of graduation is freaky in some way.. you can't deny it.

This semester, I am working and going to school. So, on the way into my office, I go by another office everyday.. I think it's an attorney or something. Anyway, they have a see-through door. Everyday I get the opportunity to pass through the hallway and see a verse written on the wall inside of the attorney's office:

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
- Jeremiah 29:11-13

These verses just remind me that no matter what path I may take upon graduation (it's still up in the air.. cool.), the Creator of the universe has plans for me; amazing plans that God has made for me specifically so that I may call on Him and come and pray to Him - the single reason I exist. So rather than getting caught up in selecting "the right way" to go from here or worrying about the future, I choose (although my actions may not always reflect it) to be dependent on that. I choose to get completely excited over the fact that while this little chapter may be coming to close in my life, I've got quite a few chapters to go.

I've heard the quote that says
"Nothing is constant in life except change."

I think it's funny. Mainly for the fact that change doesn't always make my heart happy. But how cool is it that I get to go on to new things? If they are bad, they will mold me into a stronger person, and I can rejoice in that. If they are good, they will mold me so that I may rejoice, as well. The way I look at it, it's a win win situation. There will be clinks and there will be clashes, but choose to sit back and relax and have a sip of wine along the way. Wouldn't life be boring if everything stayed the same? We wouldn't know the good for what it is - or the bad for what it is. No bueno in my book.

Also, something that puts that quote to shame:
Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever.
- Hebrews 13:8

woohoo!!!!!!!! Choose to rest in that while you're getting used to the other changes in your life.

The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning
It's time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me
Let me be singing when the evening comes