[snow in February]

this was supposed to be posted on Monday, but I just finished it.. soooo pretend like it's Tuesday.

long time no.. post?

I have been missing blogging, and although I have no particular subject on which I would like to focus on, I decided to post anyway. Sorry I'm not sorry if this post is a little incoherent and/or jumpy. Also, it's most likely going to be a bit hurried because this girl is sitting in her PJs and has class at 11:30.. oops. Read on..

This morning I woke up to a nice layer of snow at the Bob Marley house.

It was wonderful. So this week has the potential to be one of the best weeks I've had in a long time. Snow on Monday + Valentine's Day outing with wonderful people + [give or take two quizzes on Tuesday] + Valentine's Day strawberry cupcakes with cream cheese icing + Needtobreathe & Ben Rector + Fort Worth to see my lovely family. Does it get any better?

SUBJECT CHANGE - don't quit reading.. I already told you this post would be jumpy.

Do you ever feel like this new age of "relativism" where anything goes is starting to sweep the nation? Well I do. And sometimes it gets to the point in which one has a hard time separating fact from feelings.

relativism (n.): Relativism is the philosophical position that all points of view are equally valid, and that all truth is relative to the individual. This means that all moral positions, all religious systems, all art forms, all political movements, etc., are truths that are relative to the individual.

Like, I'm sorry, but who let homegirl Nicki Minaj onstage at the Grammy's last night with that beyond creepy exorcism act? When did that become okay? If you're going for the "shock" factor, Nicki, you got it. If you're going for the "you're a creep" factor, you got that one too. Straight nailed it. I just am not really sure why one would want to include something like that in their act - thousands (probably millions, actually) of people, teenagers, etc. are watching you for your talent (that is what the Grammy's are all about, right?), and THAT is what you want people to see? Anything does NOT go.

So just because something (like Nicki's little act) "feels" wrong to me, how do I know it's wrong? Feelings for me, unfortunately, a lot of the time do not go hand in hand with truth. Bill Bright, the founder of Campus Crusade for Christ, uses the example of the fact, faith, feeling train.

Wait, wait, wait..

but why do I even have these feelings?

Romans 2:14-15

¹⁴ (Indeed, when Gentiles, who do not have the law, do by nature things required by the law, they are a law for themselves, even though they do not have the law. ¹⁵ They show that the requirements of the law are written on their hearts, their consciences also bearing witness, and their thoughts sometimes accusing them and at other times even defending them.)

That's a case for a Creator if I've ever seen one.

In Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis states :

"If no set of moral ideas were truer or better than any other, there would be no sense in preferring civilized morality to savage morality, or Christian morality to Nazi morality. In fact, of course, we all do believe that some moralities are better than others... Very well then. The moment you say that one set of moral ideas can be better than another, you are, in fact, measuring them both by a standard, saying that one of them conforms to that standard more nearly than the other... You are, in fact, comparing them both with some Real Morality, admitting there is such a thing as a real Right, independent of what other people think, and that some people's ideas get nearer to that real Real than others."

Sorry for being philosophical, this was just on my mind.

In other news, I woke up from a dream this morning that I was 32 and single.. it was interesting.

[freaking out]

why.......

      do I always freak out?

      do I act as though I do not know my Maker is in perfect control over my life?

      do the things that I spend time worrying about turn out to be completely fine?

COOL, Laura, real cool. Maybe because I'm a girl.. maybe because I'm human.. most likely because I want to be in control.. because I think that I have better plans for my life than my Creator.

so obviously that's a lie, right? Yes. How can one even possibly think that they know themselves and their life goals better than THE omniscient, omnipresent, sovereign, powerful, beautiful, King of Kings, LORD of Lords who put themselves (along with the whole world, of course.. I mean we're talking sunsets, mountains, oceans, continental divides, galaxies, sounds, thought, tornadoes, earthquakes) into creation?

Probably because I'm sort of ignorant at times. Okay, REALLY ignorant.

So, today I was completely convicted over not trusting in the Lord's plans. I'm not going to go into the situation, but if you feel like you have been convicted of distrust before, feel free to read on.

"Come to me, and rest in My loving Presence. You know that this day will bring difficulties, and you are trying to think your way through those trials. As you anticipate what is ahead of you, you forget that I am with you - now and always. Rehearsing your troubles results in experiencing them many times, whereas you are meant to go through them only when they actually occur. Do not multiply your suffering in this way! Instead, come to Me, and relax in My Peace. I will strengthen you and prepare you for this day, transforming your fear into confident trust."

THAT was my devotional this morning from Sarah Young's Jesus Calling. And somehow it went PERFECTLY with my morning - funny how that works out sometimes..

As if that was not enough, the suggested reading was from Joshua 1:5, 8-9

No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.. Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.

Solid.

Time and time again humankind ( --> ME <-- ) turns away from God and His plans in false belief that we know better than Him.. a bit conceited, right? BUT He loves us.. doesn't make sense, right? We don't feel worth it. We don't feel adequate. We don't feel enough for a perfect, loving Savior. But He thinks we are.. and that, my friend, is what matters.

When Jerusalem was unfaithful (much like the human race nowadays) and engaged in detestable practices even when they had been clearly taught what to do and who to follow, God had righteous anger. Jerusalem was seeking out alliances with pagan nations and adopting their customs. If you're a mother or a father and your child knowingly disobeys, you have the right to discipline and be upset. God goes about his righteous anger by destroying the city for turning from the one, true God. To make an impact, sometimes one must go to extremes, right? Even though God saw Jerusalem as "more depraved than they [Sodom]" (P.S. - that's a lot of depravement, if you will), THIS is what the Lord says.

Ezekiel 16:59-60

"I will deal with you as you deserve, because you have despised my oath by breaking the covenant. Yet I will remember the covenant I made with you in the days of your youth, and I will establish an everlasting covenant with you." ..... aka JESUS

Now that's comforting. Just a little food for thought.

Tomorrow is the first day of my last semester of college. Crazy how time goes by. I am excited/scared/trying so hard to sit still and TRUST. There are a few things that are different this semester (sucks that I suck at change), but that doesn't mean it can't be good, right?

It's not going to be easy, it's not going to be boring, it's not going to be completely blue skies and butterflies.. but wouldn't it be boring if it was? And after all, these situations bring us closer to Him. Hellooooooooo Spring 2012!

[rainy but yummy]

Today in the Fort, it is cold and rainy outside. This type of weather makes me want to eat, sleep and watch movies - all of which I do not have time for today.

This morning I tried out Peanut Butter Banana Oatmeal Muffins - they are healthy AND delicious. Perfect for breakfast or a late morning snack - however, I am no knowledgeable chef, so you can plan to eat them whenever you want.

Peanut Butter Banana Oatmeal Muffins
Yields: 18 muffins

1 cup mashed bananas (about 2 large bananas)
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
6 tbsp peanut butter (use Bee's Knees.. it's THE best)
1 cup low-fat buttermilk
2 large eggs
3/4 cup light brown sugar
2 tbsp applesauce
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 tsp baking powder
1 cup whole wheat oats
Canola Oil Cooking Spray/some type of cooking spray/muffin liners

(Obviously, my family is down with Wal-Mart's Great Value brand..)


Directions: Preheat oven to 350˚ F. Line 18 muffin cups with paper liners or spray with Canola Oil. In a medium mixing bowl, combine the flour, oats, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Stir together with a fork to blend. In a large mixing bowl, whisk together the applesauce, brown sugar, eggs, banana, peanut butter and buttermilk until smooth. Pour the dry ingredients into the bowl with the wet ingredients and mix just until incorporated and fully blended. Divide the batter between the prepared muffin cups. Bake 18-20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. After cooled, decorate with peanut butter "icing" and a banana slice.

Listen to this on repeat while you bake - I promise it will make it better.

"Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained." - C.S. Lewis

[TRUE fulfillment]

so, today I was taking my dog Chee for a walk/letting him stop every five seconds to go to the restroom and/or smell around for other dogs. Near the end of our stop and go walk, we walked in front of this house:

If you can't tell from the picture, one of the houses in our neighborhood has their Valentine's Day decorations up.. including a heart wreath.. a "Happy Valentine's Day" flag.. and pink and red flowers.. on December 28.. REALLY????? So maybe I'm overreacting, but I cannot honestly think of one single legitimate reason why one would need to put up Valentine's Day decorations when:

a. if you weren't aware, Christmas was less than 5 days ago
b. we still have New Year's to celebrate
c. we are supposed to focus on the HERE AND NOW

So maybe something really bad happened during the holiday season one year and this person doesn't feel the need to remember this OR something really good happened on Valentine's Day and they are so ready to remember that.. I don't know - that's not what I'm focusing on. I'm more concerned about what was running through this person's brain if they are rushing into Valentine's Day for no purpose other than the pure excitement of the upcoming holiday.

Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, July 4th, Halloween..

Obviously, holidays are great. They're worth celebrating - if they weren't, we most likely wouldn't have the holiday. BUT whatever happened to taking one thing at a time - living in the moment - celebrating the here and the now? Are we possibly moving on to the next big thing in an attempt to fill ourselves with what the previous big thing was unable to do?

Unfulfilled.

At the beginning of every big season, event, whatever.. there is always such a big emphasis - a big, anxious feeling. Most of the time (in my case, at least) this emphasis is a bit too large.. okay completely over sized.

On past birthdays I've found myself getting upset over the fact that I didn't get exactly what I wanted.. REALLY, Laura? I know, I know.


One Christmas wasn't as good as the last one because it just didn't "feel" like Christmas..

This Valentine's Day wasn't as great because my date didn't plan anything spectacular..

Why do we always put so much emphasis on events, people, things, places that are bound to let us down?

Unfulfilled.

I don't think I'm only speaking for myself when I say that time after time I have found myself deeply unfulfilled with the things of this world.

- Heidi Montag was unsatisfied with herself after her multiple cosmetic surgeries.. TEN, to be exact

- Billy Bob Thorton has been divorced 5 times.. Elizabeth Taylor, 7 times

- Jennifer Lopez said she wouldn't come back for another season of American Idol unless she received more than her previous season's salary of $12 million

Not even the people who Americans seems to idolize - the multi-million A-listers who literally posses ALL the material things they could ever desire - are fulfilled with what they have. That's saying something.

Could there be a reason why we keep coming back to this lack of fulfillment time and time again?

Could it be because we are placing our hope in the wrong things?

PSALM 37:4.. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

notice that God didn't tell us to delight ourselves in holidays, riches, people, or things.. In fact, he has something different to say about those..


EXODUS 20:4.. You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below.

no - he doesn't just mean gold or wooden idols. Anything that is worshipped higher or delighted in more than the Lord is considered to be an idol.


HEBREWS 13:5.. Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

This seems easy to understand AFTER I buy another shirt in the same color.. AFTER I eat my second dessert when I'm completely full.. AFTER I get all of the things on my birthday wish list

..and I'm S T I L L not content.

But why can't I understand it BEFORE I do all of those things? It would save a lot of time and money, ya know?

because I'm stubborn. I'm stuck in my own ways. My eyes are bigger than my stomach. I'm empty and looking for fulfillment.

Well it's a GOOD thing my Creator already knows that about me and sent himself as my sin substitute to die on a cross so that I may overcome my sin in his victory of death.

This holiday season I have been trying (and failing many a time, as expected) to live in the here and now - to focus on JESUS and the reason for the season - to center myself on relationships and love.. while not putting too much emphasis on one single thing other than Jesus. It's a hard balancing act, I will admit - but I can honestly tell you that I've found this little high beam act WELL worth it.

C.S. Lewis said, "If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world."

[today is the day]

TODAY is the day I make my blog.. I have been putting this off for quite some time now. There were finals, there was work, there were obligations, and now.. now, there is time. Christmas Break is what I like to call it. For my first post, I will give a little synopsis on myself and what this blog will entail -  how are you going to decide if you want to read it if you don't even know who I am?

LAURA. Hiking, blaring music in my car, house, shower, anywhere, really (much to my nearly deaf ears' dismay), l-o-v-e, traveling, learning about Jesus, finding my purpose in life, jogging occasionally, lovable family, friends you never get tired of, laughing until you cry, plaid & stripes, writing words of meaning, a good novel, dark chocolate, cool weather, attempting to craft, coffee shops, the University of Oklahoma, blatant honesty, joyful givers, recipes and trying to follow them, learning about photography, snuggling, giving and receiving burned CDs, good scents, decorating, flowers.

This blog will have a {focus} on:
1. Purpose: through Jesus Christ
2. Random, funny stories: I am easy to make fun of, unfortunately
3. Places I encounter (or want to encounter)
4. Recipes - they will not be my own 99% of the time
5. DIY crafts
6. Pictures
7. Music
8. and whatever other stuff I feel like adding

Why Clinks and Clashes?
First off, I enjoy a good glass of wine. Secondly, I feel like life is a complete mixture of clinks and clashes - in a good way, of course. How are we supposed to appreciate the good times for what they truly are if we don't learn how to live through the bad?

and now I leave you with this..
       "and if all went right, what would we have to look forward to?"